Do you ever meet people who are just full of rubbish? My son has a classmate who insists that his great-grandfather killed Hitler. Aforementioned great-grandfather was a "pilot in the cold war". How fabulous is that? Someone wasn't listening in History.
When I was at primary school, we had a real Billy Liar in our class. My Mum, who was a dinner lady in the canteen, always referred to him as "King Size" because whatever they were serving he would always ask for "King size, please." He was invariably late for school and our teacher, Mrs Allen, was the last of the old guard, so he was in trouble. Mrs Allen wore horn rimmed glasses and made us sit boy, girl in rows of two just in the early 70's when everything was getting trendy and you wre supposed to sit in tables of six and be named after colours or something and learn to read phonetically and do "projects". Mrs Allen gave handwriting classes (for which I am eternally in her debt) and made us sew and stack our belongings in size order in the right hand corner of our desks. If anybody wrote untidlily they would be rapped on the knuckles with a ruler or made to touch their toes while she walloped them. But most of us thought she was brilliant and she was.
Anyway, I digress. King Size always had an interesting excuse for being late. Mrs Allen would listen to him politely. We had, "I couldn't get out of bed because there was a bee in my room." and "I could only find one sock." or "My sister had the alarm clock." She'd listen, then wallop him anyway.
Anyone else know any stupidly obvious fibbers?
No comments:
Post a Comment